Saturday, November 24, 2012

SOMETIMES it is better


Sometimes it is better to change your mind, way of thinking, about a thing. Emphasis on the sometimes.
This is nothing new but has been on my mind recently. The other day while I was washing dishing, I know... another blog stemming from me washing dishes. Anyway, the other day while I was washing dishes I had to check myself and my thought process. I mentally complained about one thing, then another and had to tell myself to hold up. This is not how I roll and not how I am going to start. So I changed my mind about the few things I was complaining about and in less than 5 minutes I was back to smiling and laughing.

Don't act like you all don't have those moments, too. Let me give you a few examples:

"Dang! I gotta comb ya'll hair again."
change of mind response: God, thank you for blessing me and trusting me to guide two girls for your service.

(Huge Sigh) More dishes to wash. Seems like I am always washing dishes.
change of mind response: God, thank you for blessing us with food to eat and dishes to eat it on.

You get the picture?

Fast Forward while rewinding. I think mind changes was subconsciously on my mind from a passage I had read a few days ago. It is not as light weight as the stuff I was experiencing but still speaks to the power of changing the mind. I also emphasize sometimes, because it depends on how you change your mind. Can you imagine if Harriet Tubman would have oriented her mind to be "ok" with slavery? Nat Turner? David Walker? The Maroons? Etc, Etc I didn't want to get into this. Let me post the passage:

When Columbus was selling Queen Isabella on the wonders of the America's, the Indians were "well built" and "of quick intelligence." "They have very good customs," he wrote, "and the king maintains a very marvelous state, of a style so orderly that it is a pleasure to see it, and they have good memories and they wish to see everything and ask what it is and or what it is used." Later, when Columbus was justifying his wars and his enslavement of the Natives, they became "cruel" and "stupid," "a people warlike and numerous, whose customs and religion are very different from ours."
It is always useful to think badly about people one has exploited or plans to exploit. Modifying one's opinions to bring them into line with one's actions or planned actions is the most common outcome of the process know as "cognitive dissonance," according to social psychologist Leon Festinger. No one likes to think of himself or herself as a bad person. To treat badly another person whom we consider a reasonable human being creates a tension between act and attitude that demands a resolution. We cannot erase what we have done, and to alter our future behavior may not be in our interest. To change our attitude is easier.

 Just food for thought.

I think I read this on or around Thanksgiving, which brings me to more food for thought. Many people say they do not celebrate Thanksgiving. Ok sure. Instead the reasoning (change of mind) is that we are celebrating family. I am not saying that you are not, however I am skeptical. Have we wrapped our mind around a more palitable way to swallow the pill? Can family not choose a different day/way to celebrate each other? Or can family go and participate, or dialog at dinner even, in an activity that helps to educate self and others of the atrocities associated with this "holiday". Or do we as a community continue to leave that up to the schools to do? Or do we subconsciously believe and support the genocide that occurred. Or are we just that happy to have a day off that we don't care what the reasoning? I will stop because I am getting all preachy.

"Truth should be held sacred, at whatever cost."

3 comments:

  1. That's really powerful that you were able to reframe like that again and again. Great advice.

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  2. Awesome post. I feel you on the thanksgiving thing, however, I have yet to develop as much clarity on the matter as you have.

    Love the hair comment. Now that I am finally braiding my daughter's hair instead of just letting her rock her baby fro' I find myself frequently sighing. I will reframe with the thank you LOL

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